If my father was to “wake up” from his grave today, he would be shocked to note the following about me:
– That I work online as a freelance writer and internet marketer (he would wonder if that’s really a “thing”)
– That I have clients in more than 5 countries
– That I’ve trained over 2,500 writers in my premium course over the last 5 years.
– That I’ve mentored tens (or even hundreds) of thousands of people through my blog, social media and email
The most shocking thing is that I’ve done all the above WITHOUT LEAVING MY HOUSE.
I’ve never met, seen or even spoken to 99% of the above. In fact, my life just circles around very very few people.
See, my dad died when I was almost 15 years old
I was a form 1 student at Nairobi School. I got the news on April 9th 2011 at around 6am.
It was so sad to lose that powerful man whose initials were WA just like mine! I can’t tell you how many buckets of tears I cried for my dad.
In fact, the worst thing I did was that I delayed my grief. I acted all strong and supported everyone just after his passing.
I only shed my first tears when his body was going down the grave! I however convinced myself to “man up”!
The sadness hit me 5 years later when everyone was okay. I cried rains and floods of tears. Broke down like crazy and was really helped by a friend.
Only a few knew about this. I’ve never even publicized that fact in this platform.
Please please please, never delay your grief. Never “man up” when you lose a loved one. Let those tears flow freely. It’s hard to lose someone you love, therefore it’s totally okay to mourn. Alright?
His last words to me were:
“Congrats son, you made it to a national school!”
When my father was at his strongest. He really wanted me to go to a national school. He wanted me to make it.
It was funny how he’d refuse to give me “break money” to buy mandazi for 5 bob, but when my school short was worn out, he’d quickly buy for me a brand new one for over 500 bob (I think).
Get it? He didn’t have Sh. 5 for mandazi, but somehow had Sh. 500 to buy a new short, instead of just getting my old short fixed.
MY FATHER BELIEVED IN ME…
And he was happy to see me being number 1 almost every term in primary school. To see me mentoring my peers at the time (yes, I started this “mentoring thing” as a child).
Through his strong mentorship, the company he worked for paid for me almost half of my entire high school fees.
I usually joke that I (or my effort) paid for half of my high school fees, and my campus fees before I dropped out (yes, I’m a campus dropout)! I know it’s God who made it happen, not me or my efforts, though.
My father knew that in me, there would be the next big doctor, lawyer, psychologist or whatever it is I kept saying I’d want to be (this kept changing).
No one knew that I’d one day actually make it as a writer
Definitely my father didn’t.
So, if he was to wake up right now, he wouldn’t believe his eyes.
He probably would tell me to “get a proper job”.
Good thing, he used to be happy at someone’s impact than someone’s achievements. He used to say this:
Success is the family you leave behind
To me, the definition of family is huge. I have my family, I love them dearly and feel good seeing them every single day. Oh, my wonderful angels!
I also have my mother and siblings whom I also really love.
I have many mentees who I also call my family. I spend more time mentoring people than doing anything else.
I can’t forget my Christian family i.e. anyone who does the will of the Father is a brother or sister to me.
And my wonderful friends, business partners…the list goes on.
Therefore, success to me, is the success of all my families.
For that reason, my father would still be super-proud of me seeing me working harder than ever to grow wonderful, successful families.
You have absolutely no idea what your child will become
What’s your child’s dream?
Maybe they want to be doctors but they’ve not tasted biology and chemistry yet.
Maybe they say they’ll be lawyers, but they don’t really understand the kind of reading that’s needed.
Now, technology is moving at an incredibly high speed. At their time…
Maybe doctors will just be some machines. You’ll walk in, they scan your body, diagnoze and give you meds that have higher probability to work.
Maybe surgeons will be robots that operate people at 100x better speeds and accuracy than human surgeons.
School, work and jobs will definitely be so different than the way we know it.
So, maybe your son or daughter will NOT be a doctor, but will code the software that will diagnoze and treat funny diseases at 100x speeds.
What you can do is this (pay close attention)
Like my father said, “Success is the family you leave behind.”
He had no idea I’d one day earn as an “online writer” or “internet marketer” or whatever else people call me. That thing was almost non-existent here in Kenya at his time of his death — April 2011.
But what he did was help us build CHARACTER, WISDOM AND OPEN-MINDEDNESS.
And that’s my parting shot today.
Let your kids read and get all those PHDs if they have to. Let them top their classes and go to the best schools and colleges they can manage.
Let them hone their talents e.g. singing or playing a sport.
Let them learn how to code since in their times, people will be interacting more with machines than human beings. Therefore coding will not just be some geek thing, it will be a COMMON LANGUAGE.
But apart from that, let them be wise and responsible people in the society
People who won’t take bribes.
People who will not act like children in front of the whole country when they’re supposed to be leaders.
People who will know how to choose right from wrong.
People who will not subscribe to the negative side of capitalism, where they can watch their parents wallow in poverty, while they fly in private jets.
They’ll also need to be very open-minded. Why? Because maybe their future career hasn’t been invented yet. They’ll definitely need to be wise and open-minded to take it up.
Let your children grow in character, wisdom and open-mindedness
With that, it doesn’t matter who they’ll become. They’ll do just fine!
Thank you. God bless you and your family for eternity.